Kyle Boone is a pastor in the town of Hamden, Ohio. He has done extensive research into the effect of domestic abuse pertaining to small church ministry. Statistically one in four church attendees will have been in a domestic abuse situation. Do you know how to recognize this and effectively minister in this situation. Hear what Kyle has to say.
Domestic abuse in small town churches. (0:14)
Kyle Boone, pastor of Hamden Congregational Church, discusses the prevalence of domestic abuse in society, with one in four women experiencing it at some point in their lives.
Boone notes that three women in a small church of 50 are likely experiencing domestic abuse right now, highlighting the need for churches to address this issue.
Defining and addressing domestic abuse in small churches. (3:11)
Kyle Boone defines domestic abuse as a punishing pattern of behavior for power over another, rather than just physical violence.
Boone emphasizes the importance of listening and understanding the different ways abuse can manifest, rather than relying on preconceived notions.
Husband’s selfishness escalates into emotional, financial, sexual, and physical abuse.
Kyle Boone explains the dynamics of abuse in relationships, including power play and manipulation, and how it can manifest in different ways, including selfish behavior and even violence.
Recognizing and addressing abuse in marriage. (9:07)
Kyle Boone and Ron Baker discuss the concept of abuse in marriages, including the severity and frequency of the abuse, and the importance of recognizing when it becomes toxic.
The church should provide support and intervention in cases of domestic abuse, while also promoting a healthy culture of what a healthy marriage looks like.
Kyle Boone highlights the prevalence of abuse in churches, emphasizing victims’ desensitization and blame.
Domestic abuse and its impact. (13:22)
Kyle Boone argues that abuse is not a sin of misunderstanding, but rather a result of a manipulator who wants everything their way.
Abusers are master manipulators and often think themselves the victim, leading to a cycle of oppression and violence.
Kyle Boone shares personal experiences and insights on the prevalence of abuse in Christian communities, highlighting the challenges of recognizing and addressing it.
Lundy Bond Croft, a therapist specializing in domestic abuse recovery, notes that abusers can be from all walks of life, including successful professionals and public figures.
Evangelism and justice in a changing society. (18:56)
Ron Baker discusses the evolution of society’s approach to evangelism, from guilt to self-centeredness to a focus on justice.
Kyle Boone emphasizes the importance of confronting abusers with the truth, using biblical examples like Joseph in Genesis 50.
Boone believes that while pastors may not be able to save anyone, they can point to the Bible and the image of God within people to convict them of their wrongdoing.
Domestic abuse and church response. (23:11)
Kyle Boone advises small church pastors to be slow and listen carefully to avoid taking sides in cases of abuse.
Kyle Boone emphasizes the importance of empowering women in abusive relationships by providing them with safety plans and theology of divorce.
He encourages listeners to get clear on their beliefs about divorce and marriage, recognizing that sometimes marriages can go bad and divorce can be the lesser of two evils.
Kyle Boone emphasizes the importance of addressing domestic abuse in the church, citing the need to create a safe space for victims to share their experiences and challenge the cultural norms that enable abuse.
Boone encourages pastors to be wise and discerning in their counseling, bringing in other women in the church to provide support and avoiding one-on-one meetings with vulnerable individuals.